As i was changing stations from the blue to the green line, i ran into a scenario to which i'm sure i won't give justice. In case you don't know, every now and then (usually a few times a week) you run into LA County Sheriffs who check to see if you have a ticket. If you don't, you get a fatty $250 fine. I'm happy to say, since i have a monthly pass, i don't have to worry so much about it. But not having one would definitely ruin ones day. Which brings me to the subject of our story. A middle aged black man. We'll call him Willy. He's caught without a ticket, surrounded by three uniformed cops. He's dancing around like a marionette, disputing the facts of the case: 1) just got off train & 2) no ticket. He's trying every excuse in the book, loudly complaining that he shouldn't get a fine. Almost like a 4 year old throwing a tantrum, his arms were waiving wildly, eventually settling on the "Cummon, man, gimme a break! I forgot the ticket at home, man!" line. I watched the encounter from the top of the stairs for a while, mostly seeing only the man's back. And then he turned.
The guy had an eye patch.
Un-be-leavable. A crazy, wildly dancing man with an eye patch, attempting to convince three cops that he shouldn't get a ticket.
The second encounter occurred only minutes later as i boarded the green line. I sat down in an isle seat, and proceeded to read a magazine, probably about the terrible state of the economy or something. At the next stop, passengers got on and off as usual. Now, most times there's always some bloke that has his or her iPod turned a little too loud, thus giving musical enjoyment to the surrounding passengers. So when the train started moving again, i heard, loud and clear, a melody playing nearby. I sometimes play a game where i try to figure out what song is playing. Most of the time it's R&B or Gangsta Rap, just as you'd expect on a Los Angeles Metro. And most of the songs i don't recognize. However, this tune i almost immediately knew. I paused for a second to verify. Yup. It's a sure thing. It was ABC by the Jackson 5. I chuckled and finally looked up, wondered who could possibly be listening to that tune.
And there he was. A man. A black man. A quite overweight black man. Wearing a bright gold/yellow matched fuzzy jogging suit. Long, fuzzy gold pants. Long sleeve gold fuzzy jacket, and of course, a matching fuzzy head band. It was like the guy got off the last train and got unsuspectingly smacked upside the head by a huge stereotype.
So Jonny Jogging suit is sitting there, weaving, bobbing his head like he's at a friggin' disco. He's clearly not, how do we say, an 'exerciser' (or one who exercises) so to see him get all glamored up, throwing the best of the Jackson 5 cassette into his Walkman, and hopping onto the metro was undoubted one of the funniest things i have ever seen. He could of been the star of a new movie called "Professor Klump goes jogging."